Fast forward to puberty. Clothes began to fit differently as my body changed. Rather than recognizing these new curves would one day be appreciated, I looked at it as I was getting fat in places. Combined with a genetic propensity for obesity, social pressure to wear a specific size (regardless of ones body type) and the continued "encouragement" to eat, I became overly conscious of my appearance.
My 8th grade year, after going through some life changing events, I began unhealthy habits, using food as a means of control. I gained weight in spite of my "dieting" efforts. When I reached 16 I was in a size 14P pants and large shirts. I was 131 pounds. I met my now husband then. I knew I didn't want to live as I was for the rest of my life. I stopped using laxatives as a purging method and suffered the results of my body trying to normalize. I put on 70 pounds that one year. I faced judgement about how the weight came on but I was too embarassed to share the real reason I balooned up. By nearly 18 I was enaged to be married and was over 200 pounds. I was happy, and appearance was no longer a primary focus, but the stress of life in those days hindered any motivation to get healthy. While I continued during this time to battle bulimia (no longer with laxatives) it did eventually come to a final stop. I truly feel God has set me free from this. I wanted to be a mom and this was not the example I wanted to set for my kids.
As we began our adoption journey, and 3 children later, I reached the heaviest weight I would see on my scale, 233 lbs. I had a BMI of 44.5. I was morbidly obese. People who don't know obesity might assume those this overweight are lazy or unmotivated. I'm sure I appeared that way. Neither was actually true for me. It took more effort to get anything done than it would for most. I was constantly tired! Going up and down stairs had my heart working hard. I enjoyed walking but would get out of breath at any inclination. The stress of moving would make me cranky and on edge. I could justify that blizzard from Dairy Queen each night. I worked hard and that sweet treat tasted awesome! I was killing myself slowly with food. I was put on xenical then phentramine for weight loss with no good results.
As time went on, I began to have increasing issues with my stomach and hormones. My weight affected my hormone production. Because of the problems that resulted from this, I ended up having a hysterectomy. It's similar issues that have caused infertility in obese woman. My stomach size combined with stress was creating problems with gastritis and acid reflux. Nothing over the counter worked so I was put on prescription mediation.
In these days I was not disappointed in my appearance, rather my performance--or lack thereof. Maybe being discontent about the way my body looked would have been motivation to lose weight. Bulimia wasn't about losing weight for me. I used binging and purging as a means to control things in my past that were out of my control. Knowing this has helped me overcome. Perhaps that issue of control is still there; it's just now I'm choosing health as a means to deal with it.
HOW DID I DO IT? This is the number one question I've been asked. I'd love to say I found it in me to exercise and eat right. Nope, that's not how it started at all. I watched a friend of mine who was also morbidly obese get healthy. I listened to her and another friend tell me about the health program they did. I was totally skeptical. So much so it bothered me! Weight loss shouldn't happen so quickly, right? Then I had another friend start the same program and begin to lose weight. I recall really reflecting on my life and the direction it was headed. My reality was the fact I have 3 kids I don't want to leave motherless, an awesome husband, and as much as I was in denial about my poor health, I was slowly killing myself. I was only 35 and had already forfeited my uterus and was on the verge of getting surgery on my stomach area to relieve the discomfort the extra fat was putting on me. Not to mention the stress around my ribs. If this is what 35 looked like for me, what would 45 look like? 55? Would I see 65? I want to know my grandkids and great-grandkids!
I talked to my husband and told him I'd like to start the program and give it just 1 month and go from there. The first phase of the program included meal replacements that cost money. I wasn't sure how we'd afford the extra expense, but I came to the reality, I wasn't sure how I could afford NOT to do this. Since I wasn't buying snacks and other meals for myself, most of this money wasn't even an issue. I didn't require nearly as many trips to the doctor or medication refills so I saved money that way too.
The first week on the program was tough. My body was getting used to not having sugars like it used to. After about 4 days I felt an increase in energy. I drank my water as I was supposed to and followed plan. It was really that easy. This program taught me in baby steps all the while the weight flew off! Portioned meals in phase 1 meant I didn't have to calorie count or add points. I learned what a proper lean and green meal should be. I have always accepted my optional snack the program allows so I eat a total of 7 times per day; every 2-3 hours. Eating smaller meals frequently helps keep my blood sugar regulated. I don't feel over full but don't feel hungry. Eating a good share of protein helps with muscle retention and lower carbs helped my tummy shrink 13". As the weight came off I began to find joy in this journey of health. I read labels, eat more naturally, still eat smaller portions frequently so I don't get tempted to binge. I get this crazy desire to go for walks and even hike hills. I feel more alert and alive than I ever have. My husband was so inspired, he too joined the program and has lost over 70 pounds. The impact this has had on our marriage and family has been so great he has chosen to become a health coach to help others reclaim health for themselves.
As I write, I am 153 pounds at 5' 1". I am in a smaller size than I was 30 pounds ago! This is because I retained my muscle mass with this program. I have lost 13" in my waistline, 12" off my hips, 7" off my thighs, 11.5" off my chest, and 3" off my upper arms. I went from a size 20 to an 8 in just one year.
If you are thinking dramatic weight loss and health are unobtainable, I understand. I was there too. I can testify to what this program has done for me, many around me, and offer you more information. There IS hope. It's not too late. I've had the honor of meeting so many men and women who have lost over 100 pounds without any surgery. I didn't realize it was possible to feel as good as I do. It is! This program isn't about just loosing weight. It's an optimal health program that anyone can benefit from.
I'm finding things I can do that many take for granted. I can wrap a regular bath towel around my body, cross my legs, sit with my knees to my chest and still be able to breathe... My romantic life has improved, I can walk longer distances, wear my choice in clothing, I sleep better, am less stressed out and cranky, my hygiene is easier to keep up...
And in case you're wondering, YES, this program allows you to consume chocolate!
If you are interested in reclaiming your health too, I would love to recommend you to my health coach for a free, no-pressure, no obligation health assessment to see if this program is a good fit for you. You can find Bryan on Facebook and connect with him via private message.
I'm inspired!
ReplyDelete(((Aww, thanks Nicole)))
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